Restoring Wealth to the Games

It is now  upto our athletes to win Gold to restore the Wealth!

Jumbo Heart

Jumbo Killers 

Being Passenger cum Janitor

Fortunately, there is no airline regulation and/or charge (budget airlines, please note), yet, that makes it necessary for you to put your cabin baggage only on the rack above your seat . The absence of this regulation is particularly useful when the flight is full- or even if they are not - but have holiday makers who sneak in more cabin baggage than they are allowed. It is, of course, okay for business travellers to smuggle in extra cabin baggage - you can't, after all, expect them to be whiling away their time at the baggage carousel.

As I entered the aisle, with only one piece of Hand-Baggage - as per regulation - (the other was only a backpack) I espied that most overhead baggage racks were full - all the way to row 36.I walked-down-the-aisle (fun, not pun intended), fast enough for the guy behind me not to prod me to move faster and slow enough not to miss a potential slot for my luggage, with my strolly when my spatial instincts located a parking slot over 15C. In a trice I heaved the strolly and backpack to give it a home for the next 150 minutes. Smug with my achievement, I squeezed my way back to 10A - my allotted seat.

We landed after a comfortable flight. I have often wondered what's with Indians who scramble to retrieve their luggage the moment the flight lands. Perhaps, this is a vestigial trait - from decades of scrambling to board long distance trains only to grab the space under your berth,for your luggage, before the next man can. Or perhaps it is due to the decades of training we have had standing in long queues for everything from rice and sugar (ration queue) to cinema tickets (box office queue). These "Charles Darwin" queues will take a few decades of double digit GDP growth to be erased from our DNA.

I was not perturbed when I saw the passenger from row 15 picking up my luggage. Perhaps he was doing this only to collect this luggage before returning mine back to its slot. But, hello, that did not appear to be his intention when he took my luggage and turned around to disembark from the rear exit. I did consider the possibility of hollering across to him - " hey that not your luggage" or passing on a chain message to him through the several who were in the Darwin queue to disembark. Then, the wicked thought crossed across my mind - why not avail of the free porterage!

I was amazed that he did not realize his mistake, if it was a mistake, even after lugging the unit - which would have been of a different odour,colour, dimension, weight and scars from his own luggage - across the aisle to the entrance of the coach.

At the entrance of the coach, I struck!

Me: Excuse me, are you Bharat Ram?
He : No.
Me : Well, I am Bharat Ram at it is his luggage that you are carrying!

With this I took the luggage and boarded the coach while he, in a mild state of panic, rushed back to the aircraft to retrieve his luggage - if it was still there.

Indigo airlines co-opts "Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls" to "prepare the cabin" for the next flight. If, like this time, someone could lug my 15 kilograms luggage from the cabin-to- the-coach I will, more willingly, be the airline's passenger cum Janitor.

WW III - No cover, No succour

The commanders of the Allied force still don't know what's hit them.There is disarray in their ranks. The Allies took their first hit in WW III at 29°59' N latitude 90° 15' W longitude*. 80% of the city was completely destroyed.1,836 people lost their lives.$ 80 billion worth property was damaged.

Site of the first hit in WW III

Barely had the Allies started recovering from this attack that they were attacked the second time. This second attack - a stealth attack cost the economy $ 61 billion. An estimated 5,000 people lost their lives in this attack. While the site of the attack(42° 55'N 106° 28 W'**)  has now been restored the scars still remain. 

  

Site of second attack - WW III

The Indian sub-continent which was only on the periphery of WW II is in the thick of the battle as part of the allied forces.The first attack in India took place at 34° 10' N 77° 40' E***. The attack on this region left over 200 people dead and over 1,000 people missing and many thousands homeless. The Axis forces used the deadly Jet Stream+ technology to cause untold misery to the people of this region. This weapon was earlier used by the Axis forces to imperil the lives of 14 million people in the region surrounding 34°02'N latitude 71°37'E longitude****.

The Jetstream technology of the Axis forces is so advanced that all scientific advancement in the Allied countries can't even decipher the exact nature of this technology. There are rumors that the Axis, in order to gain a comprehensive advantage over the Allied have used technology borrowed from aliens.

Site of third attack - WW III

The Axis forces have relentlessly attacked several key locations in other part of the world. As a result of these attacks in Russia, 30% of the nations crops have been destroyed. Some of the country's airports had to be closed as a result of these attacks. Pollution levels have doubled in some cities leading to abnormally high deaths due to lung disorders.

The ferocity of these attack have left the Allies shattered. It appears that they have no choice but to surrender to the Axis, unconditionally. It is reliably learnt that the Axis have agreed to stop aggressive attacks provided the Allies adhere to the following terms of surrender:

- Planting a tree: A single tree can absorb about a ton of carbon dioxide over its lifetime.
- Switching to green power : Use power through solar or wind sources where available
- Using fresh food instead of frozen : Frozen food consumes 10 times the energy of fresh foods.
- Car-pooling : Carpooling 2 days a week can reduce carbon emission by 1,590 pounds a year.
- Supporting local produce :  Buying locally produced food and thus saving on energy taken to transport food
  across the country or the world.
- Not leaving appliances on standby mode : A television switched off using the remote keeps consuming 40%    of the power consumed when "on". Using the switch on the television and other devices to switch off power   when not in use.
- Choosing products which are not highly packaged: Buying refill packs when possible. There is less waste when you buy products which are not highly packaged.
- Checking tyre pressure : Checking the tyre pressure of your car. Proper tyre inflation can improve mileage by over 3%.
- Use washing machines and dishwashers only with full load : A less than full load wastes water, detergent and other resources. Also, not setting the temperature to high. This is since modern detergents work well at low temperatures too.
- Encouraging others to conserve: Sharing information on the various methods of conservation and prevention of global warming with others.

The Axis have warned the Allies that a non-conformity with the above will invoke more debilitating attack on planet earth. They have also warned that the Weather War weapons experienced by the denizens of Earth are just some of the less potent weapons in the armoury of the Axis. It is reported that the Axis gave a demo of their Solar Tsunami weapon on the 4th August, 2010.

In the event of the Allies not meeting all the terms of surrender the Axis have threatened to launch a full scale offensive commencing from the 21st December, 2012.

Let's all join hands to prevent the Weather War.




Footnotes:
* New Orleans, USA. Hurricane Katrina, one of the 5 most powerful hurriance in the history of the USA struck New Orleans in 1985. Even 5 years later several thousands of displaced residents are still living in trailers.
** Drought and extreme heat along the great plains in the USA (in the vicinity of the Yellowstone National Park) which lead to crop failure and the death of over 5,000 people due to the heat in the year 1988.
*** The cloudburst over Leh, India killing over 200 and leaving thousands homeless.
**** 14 million people hit in Pakistan due to torrential rains.
+ Jet Stream : The deadly new weapon

Ironed Out in India - A Short Story

He kept his sight trained on the rather large luggage as it moved slowly and disappeared into the horizon of the baggage conveyor system at the Tom Bradley International Terminal of Los Angeles International airport. Never before had he prayed for the well being of his luggage, perambulating over a  baggage conveyor system, during his not so infrequent trips to India. However, this trip was not from the familiar territory of the San Francisco International airport. The baggage track at this airport ran for over 4,448 meters. Luggage was guided by technology over the four and a half kilometre route. He just added the power of prayer to  technology.

 

Sid Santhanam's trip to Bangalore was, essentially, indicative of how well Jack Welch’s 70:70:70 rule at GE has permeated into the American industry. Over several sessions with the top management, Sid had expounded how an India development centre could dramatically improve the fortunes of Instinct Financial Software, where he worked - which was already among the largest global companies in its domain. Once the project got the nod from the Board of Directors, Sid  was appointed as the Project Director for setting up the Instinct India Software Development Centre -  IISDC.

 

Burning midnight oil over the next few days, Sid  put together the paper work required for submission to the various government agencies in India, to seek clearance for the project.  Sid had moved to the USA as a student over two decades back. As an undergraduate student in India, he had heard about his country’s frustrating bureaucracy. Since he had no India work experience, he had not felt any of it.  For the setting up of the IISDC, he had to interact with three ministries and five other government agencies. He had dreaded the procedure. However, just two days into the process, he was astonished. Almost all that was needed to be done could be done on-line. He discovered that the national portal of India – www.india.gov.in had all the information that he sought. The website of all ministries and government agencies,  he uncovered, were secure and used 128 bit encryption. Digital signatures and on-line payment gateways were standard. Only a few critical documents – each consisting of many pages had to be handed over personally at the Ministry of Corporate Affairs – where they would accept these documents, have a tête-a-tête with him, before issuing the Certificate of Incorporation.

 

As he swung his backpack over his shoulders, he rechecked the baggage ticket for the only piece of checked in baggage. He then moved to Starbucks for quick sandwich and a shot of Cappuccino. As the strolled to the north of the terminal, toward Starbucks, he patted his shirt  to reassure himself that the baggage ticket was secure in his  buttoned pocket . His luggage was checked in directly for Bangalore - though his  flight had a 6 hour stopover at Dubai. He could feel the glossiness of the baggage ticket though this denim shirt. "Everything is in place", he thought to himself. There was nothing left to do before boarding the flight except having some Coffee. Then, it struck him. “O my God! I have left my bag behind at the check in counter”. He raced back to retrieve his bag, hoping he would find it. He slowed down as he spied it from a distance. The bag was untouched – who, but he, could be interested in his used clothes he thought. As he nonchalantly picked up his bag and walked back to Starbucks, he checked whether his baggage ticket was still ensconced in his shirt pocket.

 

Just before boarding, he rechecked with the ground staff if the had to rebook his checked in baggage at Dubai, for Bangalore. The answer he got was what he was told the fist time – the checked in baggage did not have to be re-booked in Dubai and could be collected in Bangalore. One of the reasons why he was travelling via Dubai, this time around, was his less than satisfactory experience with airlines which flew via London - which was his preferred route on  previous trips.In his preceding trip, he had received his checked in baggage two days after he reached Bangalore. They had not connected it at Heathrow, thus delaying its arrival into Bangalore. At Bangalore, he had to make several phone calls and more than one trip to the airport to retrieve it.

 

As he settled down into his starboard seat in the front of the aircraft, he wished he could see his baggage being loaded on the aircraft – like he could, in Bangalore.  However, the recent $ 500 million renovation of the terminal had completely overhauled the baggage handing system using overhead conveyors. He just hoped that the system was as efficient as it was expensive.

 

As arrival into DXB was announced, his thoughts went back to his checked in luggage. For the 6 hours layover at Dubai, he had been put up by the airline at the airport  La Median hotel. Before heading for the immigration, he quickly checked with the airline ground staff if he had to, by any chance, rebook his checked in luggage for Bangalore for his flight 6 hours later. The answer did not differ. Post immigration, he picked up some Dates from the Duty Free. As he selected the Dates, he wondered if a Date was just a Date. What, he wondered, was special about Dates from Dubai? He answered that himself saying date from Dubai were as different from Dates in India as Made in Switzerland chocolates were different from chocolates made in Belgium. The packaging, filling and the ‘made - in” was all that mattered. Just then, he noticed that the Dates he had selected were labelled – grown in Saudi Arabia. He further noticed that these were dipped and pickled in Glucose. He reckoned that his friends in India would like these sweetened Dates.

 

As he drove into the Median, he thought that the hotel, categorized as five star, looked more like a budget hotel – comfortable but only just. The jet lag and his state of drowsiness did not allow him to make any more observations about the hotel. He awoke, on wake-up call, just in time to leave for the airport. The Sheikh Rashid terminal at the Dubai airport, he thought, was hedonistically designed. It aroused your desire to shop whether or not you desired the things you shopped for. A few more packets of Dates, rechargeable batteries, and Belgian chocolates went into his baggage. Sid  settled down in his Business Class seat, looking forward to landing in Bangalore.

 

He awoke with a start. He felt himself being pinned down to his seat as if there was a tremendous G-force being exerted on him. He felt a pit-in-the-stomach feeling – like the ones he had felt a few months earlier, at Disneyland, as the giant roller coaster - Space Mountain, accelerated from 0 – 57 mph in 2.8 seconds exerting more G-force than a Space Shuttle launch. He automatically mumbled a prayer as he saw cutlery floating in the air, grown up men and women screaming like babies and babies looked amused at grown ups screaming. He saw fear in the eyes of the stewardess who was belted in place and held on to the seat handles. He realized, from his extensive air travels, that this was probably some kind of a turbulence that the aircraft was encountering – but was nothing like anything that he had encountered before. It seemed, that among all the passengers in the aircraft, he was the most composed, outwardly. His apparent composure came from his interest in aircrafts and aero modelling that he had done as a teenager. He was an avid follower of the blog askcaptainlim.com. Captain Lim, had, of course, in his blog clarified, several times, that for a pilot flying through extreme turbulence was no more uncomfortable than for a coach driver to drive on very bad roads. He also knew that air turbulence, or Clear Air Turbulence  was dangerous only because passengers not seated or not strapped to their seats could be thrown about the cabin due to the turbulence – caused by the outside air suddenly changing speed and direction. Sid, of course, had his seat belt on and saw the turbulence through on the strength of the seat belt and the power of his prayer.

 

After the aircraft had stabilized, the pilot announced that the aircraft had entered into an air pocket causing the aircraft to go into a free fall from 35,000 feet to 30,000 feet – not an uncommon occurrence in the annals of aviation. As the aircraft made a smooth touchdown, the passengers spontaneously gave the pilots a loud round of applause. He saw that several passengers were either in a state of shock or physically injured as a result of the turbulence. Sid was as relieved to walk out of the aircraft without a bruise.

 

Immigration was a breeze. He was pleasantly surprised with the speed with which he cleared immigration. He reckoned that this new airport was as good as  the best of the smaller American airports. As he waited at the baggage carousel, he hoped that his baggage had been loaded on at Dubai. Despite his frequent flying and his interest in statistics, he had not been able to figure out if baggage, in the cargo hold, was unloaded in a first-in-first-out or last-in-first-out mode. He waited impatiently for his Grey soft luggage, distinctly identifiable as his, from scars from his frequent travels.

As the density of luggage on the baggage carousel reduced, Sid’s heart pounded. He wondered if the luggage was connected at Dubai. Finally, it was only a lady with the trolley and he who were left at the carousel. “There it is!” screamed the lady, pointing out to the monstrous package dawdling on the carousel towards her. Sony was emblazoned across the cardboard box. It was, evidently, a television set bought by her in Dubai. Sid wondered why televisions had to be packed in such giant cartons in the days of slim LCD televisions. He also wondered why Indian consumers still shopped in Dubai when there were Sony stores all over India. Was it only to claim that they shopped abroad or whether it was account of the latest models not being available locally. He snapped out of his reverie when he realized that there was no more luggage on the track following the Sony. A chill struck his heart. It would be too much trouble to be stuck without this luggage – he would have a lot of explaining to do. As he turned, disappointedly, to enquire about the status of his luggage he saw it. His grey, distinctively scarred luggage, was in a clinging embrace with and was behind the Sony package. Sid was relieved.

 

 

He supervised the loading of his Grey checked in luggage and his hand baggage into the airline arranged limousine which would drop him off at his hotel. As the Mercedes sped away from the terminal he got a wide angle glimpse of the airport terminal building. From the outside, he reckoned that it was better looking than most other airports that he had seen

 

Once in his hotel room he unpacked and stacked his clothes in the closet. Then, he unzipped his backpack. All the documents required to be submitted to the Department of Company Affairs were in good shape in spite of the knocking that the backpack had got during the course of the 20 hours journey. He then dialled from the room phone. “Hello!, is Ravi in? Could you please send him to 205? Thanks”. Sid  had stayed  at this place frequently. He knew the General Manager, the Chef and most of the Front office, Room Service and Housekeeping staff by their names.  As the door bell rang, he opened the door to be greeted by Ravi “Welcome back Sir!” Without any further explanation Ravi walked in and picked up the scarred luggage and said “The usual Sir?” “Yes, please, Ravi”. “Can I get this back by tomorrow?"  "I leave the day after” “Sure Sir!” With this, Ravi rolled the luggage out of the room as Sid closed the door behind him.

 

Sid’s meeting at the office of Ministry of Company Affairs went of well. As he submitted the required documents, the young officer in-charge asked him some questions on the business and the time frame for commencing operations once the company was issued the Certificate of Incorporation. He was asked to download the Certification of Incorporation the next day from  mca.gov.in - the ministry's website. Sid was impressed with the speed. He was earlier involved with the setting up of the company’s office in Singapore. He thought that the process of documentation seemed more difficult in case of India but was actually as simple as in Singapore. Perhaps, it was India’s bureaucratic reputation which made things appear more difficult even when it was actually not so.

 

Back in his hotel room he watched the first semi-final’s of the IPL. As the match was getting over, the doorbell rang which Sid answered to find Ravi standing with his luggage. “All done Ravi?” enquired Sid, as he took his luggage from Ravi. Ravi smiled broadly as Sid handed him the payment for the job done – with a generous tip. Closing the door behind him, Sid heaved the luggage onto the luggage rack and unzipped it. There was a faint smile on his countenance as he appreciated its contents, all neatly strapped down.

 

“Nothing else comes even remotely close to the sharpness of clothes pressed with a traditional seven kilogram coal iron, heated to over 100 degrees Celsius”, he surmised. Then, looking at his wife’s glistening pumps from Choo, Manolo Blanhik, Chanel and Christian Louboutin he marvelled at her thrift. These shoes would have ended up  at the Menlo Park landfill, at Byxbee Park, several parties back, had it not been for the roadside cobblers at Bangalore who rejuvenated them during his Bangalore trips. 

As he zipped up his neatly packed cargo for the return journey – he thought, “Incredible India!”

The World Cup Finals : Beyond Paul

Paul, the Octopus, has already spoken, er.. predicted Spain's victory over Netherlands. For Paul's sake, I hope Spain wins the finals. If not, the Spanish may do what the Germans only threatened to do - have Paul for dinner.

My analysis of the finals is as under:
Date of Match : 11th July, 2010 which is the compound number 12 and the single number 3.
Time of Match: 20.30 hours which reduces to the Vedic number 5
Netherlands: Totals to the compound number 42 and the single number 6. Six is the Vedic number for Venus - the planet for beauty and arts.
Spain: Totals to the compound number 18 and the single number 9. Nine is the Vedic number for Mars.
Johannesburg: The city where the finals will be played totals up to 9. Again the number of Mars, which is the same as the number for Spain. Great chemistry here!

The captain of Netherlands is Giovanni Van Bronckhorst. This totals to the compound number 11 and the single number 2. The Spanish captain is Iker Casillas whose name totals to the compound number 10 and the single number 1.

The single number for the date of the match - 3 is in harmony with both 6 (the single number for Netherlands ) and 9 (the single number for Spain). This indicates that both teams are evenly poised with respect to the date of the match.

The Vedic single number 5 (time of match 20.30 hrs) represents Mercury. In Vedic astrology Mercury is friendly with Venus ( 6 is the number for Venus - the single number for Netherlands). Mercury (5 from the time of the match) is the enemy of Mars ( Mars is no.9 - the single number for Spain). Thus, here, Netherlands has a marginal advantage over Spain.

The match is scheduled to begin at 20.30 hours which is the period of Moon with the sub-period of Mercury (beginning at 20.20 hours and ending at 20.32 hours). Moon ( the period at the commencement of the match) has a neutral relationship with both Mars and Venus. This places both teams on an equal footing.

Spain totals to 9 (Mars). The place of the match, Johannesburg also totals to the number 9. This places Spain in a powerful position to win the game.

The Captain of the Netherlands is Giovanni Van Bronckhorst whose compound name number, 11, represents a lion muzzled - a person who will have difficulty. Bronckhorst's date of birth number is also the compound number 11 (5th February,1975) making it doubly difficult for him to win this match. The Spanish captain's name compound number is 10 which is symbolized (in the Tarot card system) by the Wheel of Fortune. It is a fortunate number for carrying out plans. This gives gives the Spanish team a big advantage over the Dutch.

Thus from the Vedic numerology perspective, Spain will win this match.

Let us now examine the game from the Vedic astrology charts:
The Rasi chart (Sign chart) for Spain is as under:

This chart been cast with Spain's creation taken as the 22nd November, 1975 - 12.24 pm at Madrid. This coincides with the ascension of King Juan Carlos to the throne. The Ascendant is Makara (Capricorn) at 10 degrees. 10, as mentioned earlier. symbolizes the Wheel of Fortune as also in tune with the Spanish captain's name compound number.

The Rasi chart for Netherlands is as under:

For the purpose of this chart, the creation of Netherlands has been taken as the 26th July,1581 at 12.00 hours at The Hague. The event was signing of the declaration of independence, on this date, by the State of the Union of Uterecht under the name of the United Provinces. The Ascendant (Lagna) of Netherlands, as per this chart is at 13 degree Virgo. 13 is the number of the warning of the unknown or the unexpected. It is not unfortunate but indicates a change of place and plans.

For Spain, the Lord of the Year is Shukra (Venus) which is powerful this year indicating success for Spain. For Netherlands, the Lord of the Year is Guru (Jupiter) which is moderately powerful, indicating moderate results.

Thus from an Vedic astrological view point too, it appears, that Spain is poised to lift the cup.

Spain may win this game by a margin of 2-0 with both the Spanish goals coming in the second half.

While it does appear that the stars favours a Spanish win, stars give way to great human effort. Efforts can overcome Karma.

May the Better Team Win!

The Foreign Secretary's New Clothes or Hips May Lie